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Poor use of a Million Dollars – Volume II

Greetings once again underlings.

I come to you to bring you a story of great woe which has befallen one of my brethren. Before I continue too far, however, I should point out that the title of this post, while in keeping with the title of the previous post on this topic, is not entirely true. You see, in this case, I speak of a poor use of half a Million dollars.

I read the tale of a local Millionaire recently, a man who had made his Millions in the mining industry, who is just now turning his Millionaire’s eye for power to all sporting teams in the region. This man, in his grand misfortune, left his house unlocked, allowing some local thieves to make huge leaps in their ability to donate to my cause. These thieves successfully made off with wrist watches, laptops and a digital camera. They also took a 2010 Ferrari California convertible, valued at approximately $500,000.

Ferrari California

Valued at: More than your house.


Fortunately, Mr. Tinkler’s exceptionally valuable car was recovered, leaving the thieves unable to contribute further to my Millionaire fund. In an unfortunate twist for my cause, it also limited Mr. Tinker’s ability to contribute to my cause.


Burned out Ferrari California

Despite not being a certified car valuation expert, it is apparent to me that there has been a decrease in value here.


Ultimately, I can’t honestly say that this has been an effective use of money, though to pass up a $500,000 car, the car thieves themselves are clearly a gang of joyriding Millionaires, set on displaying their largesse in an exceptional manner. Police are currently on the lookout for people wearing top hats. I would like to take this opportunity to publicly declare my innocence.

– The Millionaire


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