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A Robbery

Greeting Plebes.

I, your humble Millionaire have something to report. I was robbed today. Or rather, I should say that we were robbed today. That’s right contributors and contributors to be, some jealous individual has seen fit to remove €110 from my Paypal account earlier today. As the recipient of your hard earned money, I feel somewhat slighted on your behalf. Admittedly, while the would-be thief did more to earn that money than I did, still, you chose to give it to me and that says a lot about you. Mostly, however, it speaks to my own character.

Enough about me, however. Paypal helpfully caught the series of transactions and have, at this point, returned most of the money, the remaining €20 to be returned pending investigation. This barely leads to my next point. Europe, you’re at about the end of your tether as far as this Millionaire is concerned. I’ve yet to see you contribute anything of merit money to this cause. Once we start to see some contributions from you then perhaps my issues with you will begin to resolve. Until that point, however, consider yourself to be officially on my list. As for you, Spain, what I said for Europe goes double for you. Watch your back. This millionaire is financing a private army to deal with your outrageous offenses against my person, and that private army will be hell-bent on removing Spain from the world map. This army of Cartographers will stop at nothing until they figure out a way to keep Portugal attached to Europe without Spain in the middle.

Your days on the map are numbered, Spain.

And to my friend with the clever designs on my money, at least when I take other people’s hard-earned money and offer nothing in return, I have the courtesy to ask nicely.

As a gentleman does.

– The Millionaire.



  1. Angry American says:

    I think you should use your vast wealth to purchase this country.

    1. I am very strongly considering it. Said vast wealth is, however, looking somewhat incapable of doing so at the moment, since the current total stands at $110. Spain had a 2009 GDP of 1.360 trillion dollars. A quick consultation with my advanced statistics generator indicates that I am currently $1,359,999,999,890 away from being able to rent Spain for a single year. I think the cartographers might be the cheaper option at this point.

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